What's it like to see the Tao?

great email I received from Bill..enjoy
..added by danny...
................

Dear danny,

People have asked what's it like upon awakening.
 What's
it like to "see the Tao" - what's that mean?

What's it like to see the Tao? It's as if a
long time perimeter,
border, or veil has been lifted and you can
 now see things as 
they really are. You suddenly realize -
through the knowing 
nature that is you -  that everything you
hear, see, perceive 
is just the Mind. And then you realize
there is no ego because  
there is only Mind. That's it - that's the
only existence, but the mind's substance
is empty so you can't 
say it's
existent either. But you call it Reality
 because now you know 
what's
truly Real in all your experiences, in all
 the universe - for 
the whole
universe is inside it. You can laugh with
joy, cry with joy, 
or laugh
and cry at the same time for you
instantaneously recognize with 
true
certainty that you've come home and that
 there is no Tao other  
than This
One. Everything is just this knowing essence
 we call the Mind.

But the thickness of long time habit energies
 still exists and 
can
reassert itself so you can lose this
realization, this insight, 
this direct
perception even though you now KNOW, REALIZE,
 SEE, PERCEIVE that
 this
is the Truth,theultimate state. This is not
 normal worldly knowing,
 but
BEING KNOWING, true knowing - there are no
 words that would describe
it accurately since you're outside of all
the falsity that was before.
Another way of saying this is you have no
doubts, you have true belief.
But this recognition is a direct perception
, it isn't a belief or idea
but a true knowing - you know this because
you're in TRUE knowing and
out of all phenenal knowing. True knowing,
 or transcendental prajna
wisdom knowing, is the term most schools
give this self-realization.
 With
a wink of turning around, you understand,
and then you also realize 
why
you were in illusion. It was all the habit
 energies of mental clinging
to thoughts, to using the mind incorrectly.

Dang! It was there all along like a jewel
sewed into a coat which you
can't see though it's there. Dang! It was
 there for so long unnoticed,
right there in front of you, and all you
did is foolishly cover it over
because you refused to let go. When you
tried to let go in meditation
you kept trying to impose comprehension
and understand what was
happening when that state of not understanding
 was the right way. Drop
 your
habit of trying to impose comprehension as
its born. Why? Because the
Mind's knowing is the correct knowing - the
thought of confusion is just
 a
thought it KNOWS. You realize that you should
 just let things arise in
this Mind without imposing comprehension. 
After awhile, chaos sorts
itself out and dies down naturally. Don't
try to sort out the chaos with
your mind - just reflect its presence that
it's there.

Confusion departs without any effort. The
clarity of wisdom is knowing
what's clear or unclear, so trying to
discriminate clarity out of chaos
is wrong - you are already clear that there's
 chaos so don't impose
discrimination trying to transform it.
 Whatever is transforming just 
let
it transform without adding internal words
or names or labels to it.
Shut off the commenting chatter. The chaos
of confusion is not a
hindrance that has to be solved. The darkness
 of chaos is temporary and 
is also
just another illusion arising within Mind.
Darkness, chaos, confusion
all arise within the Mind which, while being
clear knowing, knows their
nature as dark and leaves it at that since
that is their phenomenal
nature -- they are just phenomena without
meaning, so let them go and
don't try to impose comprehension. How
confused you have been mistaking
that for millennium.

The original Mind itself in which they and
 everything else arises is
empty, is clear, it has no thinness so we
say it is substanceless or, 
the
term I prefer is "indivisible." What arises
in it has no reality but
is just mind stuff. Everything that arises
is ALL mind-stuff, and our
distinguishing or discriminating forms and
 appearances is the incorrect
use of the mind, for that discriminating is
 the very
definition-being-essence-function of clinging
. Phenomena may arise and 
transform but that
original nature is unbecoming. It never changes
 or transforms or turns
into something else.

The empty mind that gives rise to everything
is the true nature of
reality. Everything arises in there. It
contains the universe. All 
things
appear in it, and then you realize the Tao,
 you next laugh how silly
 it
is to run after anything because the mind
is substanceless and empty
and cannot possess anything.  It cannot
possess ANYTHING. It's
impossible. So all those struggles are
fruitless and pointless - 
pointless to
even start, and fruitless because they can
 never be attained. All that
arises within the mind is just an illusion,
 an illusion where everything
depends on everything else through cause and
 effect. Karma holds the
tapestry together but with this initial
enlgithenment or awakening you
cannot fully fathom the emptiness of phenomena
 yet, just the emptiness 
of
being a self or person.

And other beings? They are This Mind as well
 ... beings are like the
reflection of the moon in infinite puddles
 of water. There is only
 one
moon in the sky but infinite reflections, all
 of which capture the 
moon's
light and seem real, but there is only one
 moon. So imagine an
invisible sphere projecting internally inside
 itself these puddles 
that can
reflect images or know images like the water;
 the surface of the sphere
projects those tiny knowing reflective surfaces
 inwardly. That knowing
sphere is Mind or awareness, and the small
internal reflections or
projections inside are also this same sphere
- the  surface of the 
sphere.
That's why imaginary beings also have this
wonderful  power of awareness
but are all this same One Mind. They are
 illusions that are projected,
for they are really just the surface of
the sphere. They all return to
the same One Source. Now remove the idea
 of this invisible sphere -
remove any ideas of thickness, shape or
infinity entirely because it
has no beginning, ending, borders, substance,
 nothing whatsoever -
there isn't a sphere there -- and you get
a poor analogous description of
how beings think they are all independent
 natures when they are all the
same source essence, the same original nature,
 the same prajna wisdom.
They are all inside the Mind's bright clarity
 nature. That's the only
way I can describe it as an analogy. All
sentient beings share in that
original source perceiving, we are all the
original nature. But are you
using it to be bound to thoughts from attachment
 to the small, or
letting go to return to the Real All.

The Mind is the nature of things. You see this
when you "see the Tao."
It is empty but gives birth to everything that
 arises, which are just
temporal images, illusions or appearances within
its pristine presence
or nature.  For so long, since beginningless times
, you have subtly held
on the feelings of the body, or chi, or thoughts
 or consciousness and
made them into a cocoon you called "yourself." But
 the cocoon was never
real and all the intertwining and envelopments and
 einvolvements you
ever tried could bnever make it real either. All
 thoughts and feelings
were like "reflexive pingings" against this imaginary
 border or
perimeter of thoughts which always seemed to be there
 but which weren't.
 You
have been trying for endless time to define
yourself through these
reflections, trying to create a reality where
there is none, trying to 
spin
another layer of entanglements to make it real
,  but the effort was
fruitless. All you ever did was increase your
 confusion and remain invo
lved in the dark, refusing to see the light.

But all of a sudden, due to your cultivation
 work and merit, you let go
and the veil lifts like Saran wrap being peeled
 away from a smooth
surface. The veil lifts, the perimeter disappears
 and you realize this
 is
all only mind. The barrier that always seemed
 to be there, as if a
haze, and by which you shut yourself off from
 what's true, cocooning
yourself, is gone. It was never real to begin
 with but was just the
obscuration of clinging incorrectly, and you
realize if you had just 
ignored it
and refused to use it and mentally let go you
could have known the
truth ages ago. For years you clung to that
 hazy barrier, trying to 
use it
to define yourself when you really were this
 greater All. You gave up
the great for the small, the inconsequential,
 the false, the
non-existent. Everything real you've been
searching for you could 
never find
because whatever you searched for was always
within this false realm.
 But
now you "see the Truth." You "see the Tao."
You "see the Path." You e
xperience awakening. You now know what the
self is, and the internals
doubts, fears and worries are gone because
you now have surety - you
KNOW you can never be rid of This Knowing One.
 And you know that with
security, with knowing, with truth, with faith
 so your realization is 
true
and real and called self-realization.
As Confucius said, you have no
more doubts. You are no different than all
 the Buddhas, and so are all
sentient beings. They are nothing different
than this same This One.

Even the thoughts of being a "you" are only
 thoughts. You realize there
is no personal identity, just the mind, but
the habitual problem of
perceiving incorrectly still remains - the
 habit of clinging or
attachment to what arises still remains, the
 habit of using thought 
incorrectly
still remains, the habits of the passions and
 desires still remains
that can reassert themselves in obscuration
 once again -- so the problem
of phenomena or what arises in the mind is
not yet seen through clearly.
However, now you  have seen the Way, the
Truth, the Tao. You have true
knowing, or True belief. Another way of
saying this is you have no
doubts. You know this.

Now you know how to cultivate correctly.
 Habit energies of clinging 
and
attachment can obscure this clear knowing
from time to time. Even
these habit energies are false and
non-existent (from the standpoint 
of the
original nature), so obscuration is unreal
 ... the clinging is unreal.
How do you return to non-delusion? You just
 jump out with one moment
of letting go.  It's like using the Wisdom
Buddha  Manjushri's sword -
"woosh" with a swish you're back home. All
you do is detach from
thoughts and instantaneously all of true
reality arises. The doing is
 no doing
because you're not doing anything in the
pheneomal realm but just
letting it continue to spin without your
mental involvement. You just 
let
go of clinging, or we can say "let go of
clinging to delusion," or we
can say "let go of delusion," or we can
say "just let everything arise
without attachment,"  or "drop falsity."
 "Woosh" swings the sword of
detachment, cutting off clinging, and the
 All Body of Reality arises in
stantly. For an ordinary meditation
practitioner their chi will change
instantly, they won't know what's
ging on, and those trasnfromations
are the right transformations as
they'll all settle down to reveal
clarity. That's the right
way to cultivate.

The funny thing is, that
 original pristine
clarity knowing
 has always
been there,
 so you're not creating it.
 You just turn around and realize
what's doing the perceiving.
 And you also realize that since you cannot
possess anything,
 but phenomena still arise
in the mind, the best and
only way to act is to offer
to others without holding to anything, to
do things for others unselfishly.
 You don't exist, but the karmic result
of happiness, joy and peace for others,
 even though empty of reality,
is the right response to engender
 because this unreality of karmic
appearances, even though samsara
, is of the same nature of the mind. 
Hence
one ends up choosing to do good
 rather than evil. And in offering,
giving charity, and practicing
 all good works
unselfishly one
is letting
go, giving up,
 and practicing actions
 that accord with the very fabric
nature of reality.
 These are the ONLY actions
that accord with the fabric
nature of reality.

***